Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Provocation or Explanation, Language we must

Our language is more powerful than we often imagine. I was talking to a team member this morning, asking, how he is doing and his answered was, “hanging in there.” As this morning and every other morning when I am at work, I greet team members each morning and always take interest in their responses; some gives the standard answers and some replies with how they really feel but for the most part, we greet each other with neutral words that have no power. Think of the last time you heard someone else (or even yourself) respond to a greeting of "How are you?" with "Oh, I am doing so-so," "Hanging in there," "I'm surviving" or "Not too bad." It probably wasn't much past yesterday or perhaps today.


Fundamentally from a macro level, language drives the changes to any culture. As most changes in this world; they are often driven by a charismatic rhetorical figure that has the ability to conjure language that cause changes in people hearts and minds. Hence, language is always the provocation of any changes. Therefore, our usage of language is just as critical to our daily interaction as anything else that we do. We can either use language that describes our current situation, language to change our situation, or language that ignite changes to someone else situation. Therefore, it is severely important for us to understand that our language carries this much power. 


Suggestion, the next time anyone asks, "How are you?" whether it's one of your team members or a cashier at the store, respond with strength. Give them an energetic, enthusiastic, “I am Grateful!” “I am Awesome!" or "I am Terrific!" At times, it will be hard to do without a smile on your face but you are likely to get one back. You will likely feel a physical response of increased energy. Hence, your words will send a message to your mind that will be consistent with feeling Grateful! Awesome! or Great!


To see the results, you have to do this often and with sincere enthusiasm (not robotically). When you do, you will subconsciously begin to act on what you are saying and begin to design your reality to be consistent with your thoughts and words. Speaking with power also creates a sense of accountability and commitment to get the best from yourself and others.



Hence, I challenge every one of you to consciously seek language that ignites positive behavior from oneself and others and to avoid using words that provoke negative energy. Thus, think about it when you are talking to someone: are you creating positive or negative situation?

Friday, November 28, 2014

Patrick Lencioni - The 5 dysfunctions of a team


Vulnerability of my Soul

My sweet soul that occupied everything but inhabit nothing

Imagine how it could be?

How I don’t fit into your pattern?

Imagine how it could be?

How could I have woven a new pattern?

Imagine how it could be?

Pattern that woven around the vulnerability of my soul

Imagine how it could be?

Dancing to the Defenseless Pattern of my in-habitation 

Imagine how it could be?

This life I live, happiness is my choice?

Imagine how it could be?

This life I live, sorrow is my choice?

Imagine how it could be? 

Vulnerability show me your strength

Imagine how it could be?

Faith I may follow from the nothingness of thy self

Imagine how it could be?

For death I will be, usher me my savior


Imagine how it could be?

Thanksgiving will always 

Imagine how it could be?

                   - Tanga'otalakepa 11/28/2014 

Sunday, June 1, 2014

what nature tells us



“When I say... "I am a Christian"




“When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin'."
I'm whispering "I was lost,
Now I'm found and forgiven."

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
And need His strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
And need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
But, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain.
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
Who received God's good grace, somehow.”

― Maya Angelou

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Be an Anthropologist

The other day I was asked by our new District Director about my Personal mission Statement; I am not sure if it is personal because it is not all about me, here we go: “Under the infinite mercy of our Lord, I am showered with undeserved Grace while trying to figure this life out; It is my mission to make a daily positive contributions to humanity.” However, I am often caught up in this “me” world and forgot about the selfless part of my mission.

Why am I telling you this? Let see, as human, everything that we do is at the mercy of someone or something else. Right! You heard me, everything. Unfortunately or perhaps, fortunately, we do not exist in a vacuum. Today, I said to myself: “Why does good thing happen to bad people?” Yep, that’s me. What have I done right?  Truth be told, someone else have done something right and not me. Therefore, I think, we must all be an Anthropologist – we have to figure out what makes human human. Why do I think the way I think? Why do I think that I am undeserving of good things? Frightening thought but, as leaders, we have to venture into this realm of what makes me me and what makes you you.

Back to business, “Know What You Don’t Know” by Michael Roberto talks about the notion of being more than just a problem solver and stresses the importance of being a problem finder. Roberto points out that “most large scale failures have an incubation period and are not the result of a single root cause, but a chain of errors.” However, as we improved with our numbers and performances, it gets tougher to see small errors incubating beneath us. This is why we have to rely on communication with everyone in order to keep small problems from growing into big ones. Inevitably, this means dealing with the challenge of filtering and finding ways to connect straight to the source.

Roberto shared two basic techniques for developing yourself as a problem finder: 

Circumvent Gatekeepers

It’s important that we remember that we all are gatekeepers and are trying to do our best to boil down information into simple sound bites and talking points for the sake of time an simplicity. But that often means blowing over small, peculating issues and leave them tucked away. As Gatekeeper, we decide what need to be dealt with and what need to be tucked away. 

To combat this, Roberto recommends that every so often we carve out time to review the raw data of our Team—this is why we have the daily Tracker for our Priority Metrics and you are encourage to analyze them daily by looking at them with your Problem Finder's eyes. The idea is to break away from the standard routine of reports that have become staled and predictable. Take a look at data you don’t normally review, or read some of the reports that are available in sharepoint, business object, or Field Reporting. Hence, as you are looking at the metrics that has been assigned to you, look at it with problem finder's and QDM's eyes; thus, what other information that I can find to help me understand this metric? Whether you at goal or not, you should always look at what are the potential problem that could prevent you from improving. Thus look at these metrics with “how can I improve?” eyes.  

I will also change up metrics assignment to maximize the diversities of problem finders. Often, some team members will be less constrained in what they are willing to tell or share from their problem finders—As we are moving into a New Year with a New District, my challenge to all of you: “Be an Anthropologist” and understand why makes a person that person. I also encourage you to be a Gate Keeper that does not discriminate on the finding by analyzing the process with a holistic approach. 

By now, all of you know how much I love football, watching it anyway; nevertheless, I spoke about this before when I was watching the Florida State University vs. Clemson last fall. The name of the quarterback for FSU is Winston; he threw a pass to his running-back which is 5 yards in front of him and then ran up to block for the running-back-- that is “rolling up your sleeves” leadership. Do not limit yourself to the parameter of your task. If you are on the field, every play from start to finish is yours, regardless of position. You can’t throw the ball and sit back—you throw the ball and run up and block.    

Encourage Useful Failures

The most successful Teams started out by failing, but they were willing to take a shot, and then another, and another… until they made it. Sometimes you have to do a little experimentation before you figure out the right answer. There is quote that is framed up in my office by Jacob Riis "... Yet at the hundred and first blow it will split in two ..." This should be the approach for Team Abilene. Should someone ask how do get things done in Abilene, quote them Jacob Riis. I spoke about this before “failing your way to success.” And I've use Riis and Thomas Edison example before, we cannot stop on the number 100 failures, it maybe the 101 attempt the get us the victory. Thomas Edison was fired twice and failed at his first 1,000 attempts to create a working light bulb. Oprah Winfrey was fired from an early job as a Baltimore TV reporter because she was deemed unfit for TV news. Go figure! 


When it comes to failure, Roberto advises not to wait for a failure to create a learning opportunity, but instead create opportunities to fail. In other words, create experiments and pilots to test ideas in an environment that is safe. This will encourages everyone to acknowledge and address failure in a positive way they can learn from, and will lead to a more open culture where employees will be more willing to share little errors before they erupt into major problems.

Thursday, May 15, 2014

To Conquer is To Obey

One of the old sayings that I’ve heard growing up: “In a fight between the world and me, lets bet on the world” Yes, this makes a lot of sense – the world is much bigger and stronger by the numbers. But truth be told on MY Reality is, I spend most of my time fighting against the world and betting on myself. The unfortunate thing is, my perception of who I am is always telling me that I am RIGHT. The fact is just not true!

 Here is a relief—Not a Single IDEA was a good idea on the day that it was perceived. IDEA is just new and not necessary good. More often than not, we stop on the bad idea and never get to the good, that is when we are conquered. Look at Thomas Edison, prior to his invention, in order to create light, you have to burn something—you burn oil, wood, etc… What he wanted to create is, create light by preventing something from burning? The fact is, he spent numerous hours and hours on many many bad ideas before he got to the invention that won over the world.


 We are surrounded by an environment that is full of innovation waiting for our creativity button to be pushed. I remember Emmanuel Kant saying: “The light dove, in free flight cutting through the air the resistance of which it feels, could get the idea that it could do even better in airless space.” The fact that this is the very air that enable the dove to fly; thus, an airless space would kill the dove and everything else, for that matter.  Yes, sometimes we resisted the very environment that allows us to be creative not knowing that this is the very thing that keeps us going—bite the hands that feed you! Instead of resisting the “air”, we should ask, how can I create something with the air?

Here we go, the best way to have good idea is to have many ideas: remember QDM brain storming! If you want to think, obey the “law of thinking.” If we want to be creative, we have to “obey the law of creativity.” If we want to change, we have to “obey the law of change.” The bottom line is, “we have to obey the forces that we want to command.” Hence, in a fight between me and the world, I have to obey the law of the world in order to conquer it. But remember, some of these are not as obvious!


 Therefore, how we can conquer? Lets look at Einstein, for the new creation of the State of Israel, he was proposed to be the president of the new state. Obviously, he resisted this proposal. What about Churchill and Gandhi? [I’ve talked about this before] If we switch role between these two great leaders (Churchill-Gandhi), they would fail so as Einstein as the first president of Israel. Hence, pick the forces that you want to command and obey it’s law.


To be continue…


Tuesday, April 8, 2014

The Quilt

The Quilt  by Finau Siale

One day couple years ago toward the end of the summer season, when I was stationed in Abilene, I was on my way to San Antonio, TX, Taking Highway 87 south, I stopped at a store in Fredericksburg; the name of the store was Auer Haus. I walked in and saw this beautiful and colorful quilt, as I was admiring the beauty of its many colors and the wavering patterns that seem to be telling hidden joyful stories, the store keeper walked up toward my direction and asked if I needed any help. I expressed how marvelous and stunningly beautiful this quilt that caught my eyes; my mother had passed but it reminded me of many quilts that she crocheted. The store keeper said that the quilt maker was blind. How amazing is that the power of the human imagination, that one’s sense and ability to physically visualize the physical reality is gone, yet, still have the capacity to demonstrate the fundamental ability to see and display beauty from within! Although my mother was not blind but she, like this blind quilt maker, had the ability to visualize the true beauty from within and not limited to the physical characteristics of things.  Perhaps what is usually considered by society as limitation is truly a gift. Hence, from that day on… “I declared that My Limitation is a Source of Strength.”

I got to San Antonio that Monday evening and Monday Night usually means “Monday Night Football,” at times, despite the violence of the sport and the blood, sweat, and tears that associated with the, not so obvious, football, the passion of the game, while in the trenches, often diverted my attention to overlook any negative associated with the game itself  but to experience the game like millions of red blooded American do throughout this country—simply says: “I enjoy the game of football.”  Here we go again with more football analogy.

On the radio in the car, the discussion focused mainly on what happened during Sunday's buffet of football games, on the Colin Cowherd sports radio show, he said something about quarterbacks that is, to me,  philosophically profound for life in general and in particular with anyone with physical disability.  Colin Cowherd said sometimes a person's limitations are directly related to their success.  His comparison was between quarterbacks who are highly gifted athletes who, in addition to having strong arms and great knowledge of the game, can effectively run with the ball and quarterbacks who lack that athletic ability to run.  The quarterbacks who lack mobility have to rely completely on their ability to find open receivers and throw the ball to them accurately and quickly before the defense can reach them.  Running is not an option.

The point was this:  great singers will find a way to sing even if the moment doesn't call for singing. Great dancer can find occasions to dance, even without music and gifted athletes find the occasion to exercise their athletic ability in any given event.  However, sometimes the situation doesn't call for the expression of a particular gift.  You see, in football, it is best if the quarterback can get the ball into someone else's hands rather than taking it himself.  But for the quarterback who is a gifted runner--they find occasions to run, sometimes to the detriment of their team and other times to the detriment of their health—RGIII.

I hope you still with me here: let’s use this framework, Cowherd went onto name quarterbacks who more or less lack the athletic ability to run the ball themselves—Peyton Manning, Aaron Rogers, Tom Brady, Eli Manning, Drew Breeze, should I continue?  The truth is, you probably heard of these names before but if you know football, you will recognize those names as five of the most successful quarterbacks in modern football and one thing they all have in common; they all won Super Bowl’s. Therefore, I can argue that their lack of the ability to run actually helps them make better decisions because running the ball is not an option—let just say running the ball is their weaknesses.

Here is my question for you? Can you imagine if we stopped seeing our limitations as barriers, instead see them as the very energy that directs us into using our true abilities to accomplish our TRUE Greatness!  Each one of us is equipped with unique talents and abilities, which means even our weaknesses, are source of our strengths. Here is our challenge: identify your weakness and build on that very source to gain your GREATNESS. Should you have any question? Ask the Blind Quilt maker of Auer Haus. I wonder if that quilt would have captured the same magnificence beauty if she was NOT blind. Yes, our Limitation is the very source of our Strength.​ 

- Finau Tangata'olakepa Siale

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Where can I find myself?

I found

In my mirror, I found history.
In my children, I found legacy.
In my wife, I found companionship.
In my Family, I found trust.
In my Tongan, I found culture.
In my fear, I found courage.
In my anger, I found rejection.
In my work, I found control.
In my joy, I found hope.
In my vision, I found passion.
In my sorrow, I found self-pity.
In my excellence, I found satisfaction.
In my procrastination, I found weakness. 
In my creativity, I found possibilities
In my solitude, I found meaning.
In my old age, I found wisdom.
In my St Paul, I found community.
In my service to others, I found purpose.
In my Jesus, I found redemption.
In my God, I found Everlasting Love
In my Death, I found Eternal Freedom.
Again, I found myself a child of God.

Where have I found myself?

Inspired by Dr. Robert Monk on 30th. of March, 2014


- Finau Tangata'olakepa Siale
3/30/2014

Friday, March 28, 2014

Holy Freedom

The iconic stage of my soul
The losses of my existence
The experiences that were forced
The interest that never happen
The thrill that I never had
The conclusion of my non-experience
The toleration of being vanished
I felt a funeral in my head

I know it is ridiculous
I know it is thinking less
I know it is feeling less
I know it is seeing less
I know it is tasting less
I know it is smelling less
Concentration camp of numbness
I felt a funeral in my head

To whom who is beyond good and evil?
The depressed soul that veiled
The heart that disguised
For my spirit that meander throughout
Oh! The secret that I’ve not share
The vitality that I long for
The disability of my mind
I felt a funeral in my head

Where have all the blossom gone?
Veiled happiness, can you take a peek?
Unwanted love, can you love again?
The pleasure of my soul sails on
My desire is muddy in my grave
Yearning only for the everlasting
Hiding me from thy transcendent spirit
The moral imperative of thy mystery
I felt a funeral in my head

Holy Freedom

- Finau Tangata'olakepa Siale

Recharge Momentarily

Some of you may have heard the saying: “Unchallenged life is a life not worth living” or, may be it is: “If you are not learning, you are dying,” for the most part, I struggle with these statements, as I feel, at times, I just wants to be idled, left alone—hence, not challenge and not learning. However, the truth is, life never gives us momentarily idle or leaves us alone, something or someone is always pulling/pushing us one direction or the other’s. Therefore, I think, rather than let the day-to-day details push us around; we must build our capacities for solidarity yet be inimitable in our own individuality. Yes, I am serious!

As most of you know, I am a checklister and a QDMer, you all know how much I love to put tasks in your Outlook’s and I just love it when a task is done timely. But as much as I love working off a calendar full of checklist, I make it a very special time for me to step away from the task-based, project-based, and calendar based day-to-day details of each day and build my capacity for solidarity yet be inimitable in my individuality—yes, know that I exist in this world which are surrounded with others yet, I am my own-individual-self and every decision I make impacted all.

I am not saying that building capacity for solidarity yet be inimitable in our individuality comes in the same form for everyone; but we must allow our soul, mind, and body to recharge momentarily each day with whatever it is that makes us meditative. For me, it is the first thing every morning when I wake up, it is the best time for me to be reflective, but the funny thing is, I even make that a calendar entry in my outlook—so much for staying off checklist momentarily.  


- Finau Tangata'olakepa Siale

Manifest Destiny

To think that we come into a process and fix anything because it was broken by someone is an assumption that we conferred on ourselves in order to inflate our value toward the process. We do not fix anything; we evolve, create, innovate, and move forward—Fixing is a supposition that automatically assign wrongness to someone or something else. Rather than assigning wrongdoings, our purpose should always be forward looking, what can we learn and move on. Assigning Falses is a process of backward looking; it is a process of living in the past. The energy that cost us to assign the blame can be best spent on fixing the problem. To think that we are only better because someone else did poorly is to affirm that our values are predicated on failures of others. Manifest Destiny is the assumption that we are better and you MUST live the way we live because you are better for that; how arrogant can we get?

- Finau Tangata'olakepa Siale

Biblical Counseling Notes February

  Anxiety Misplaced of fear and worry is the beginning of anxiety. Fear and worry are not inherently bad or wrong but how we react to it t...